“Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.” ~ Arthur Somers Roche

Are you facing an uncertain future?

There are 4 Ways To Cope With Fear When Facing an Uncertain Future

When going through a time of incredible change and transition, it’s natural to feel as if the very ground beneath you is crumbling. As you experience this uncomfortable feeling of being groundless, you become aware that your anchor to everything you have known is being taken away. Suddenly, in front of you is an uncertain future as you watch everything changing in your life.

Perhaps you’re grieving the loss of a loved one, or going through a painful divorce.

This change can create tremendous fear as your mind becomes filled with thoughts such as, What will happen to me? Can I support myself financially? Will my children be all right? Will I ever be able to recover from this at my age? Will I be alone for the rest of my life?

Here are 4 ways to cope with fear when facing an uncertain future:

1. Understand the Nature of Fear-Based Thinking

There are two crucial concepts drawn from cognitive behavioral therapy. They are: 1) The only things you control in life are your thoughts and your actions; 2) Thoughts = feelings = actions.

Studies show it is impossible to have a feeling without first having a thought. This is fabulous news and validates the value of learning mindfulness and developing an awareness of your thoughts. If you can control your thoughts, you can affect how you feel and what actions might follow.

Fear and anxiety live in future thinking. They focus on things that MIGHT happen, but haven’t yet and MAY NEVER happen. Fear loves to have power over you in this way. It makes you feel as if things that might happen have already happened! Fear and anxiety do not exist in the present moment thinking.

2. Use Your Intellect

When you understand the nature of fear-based thinking, when you know that you control your thoughts, and when you’ve developed mindfulness tools to cope, you’ll have an increased awareness of when your mind slips into fear-based, future thinking. When this happens to you, exercise compassion and know that others are challenged by this, too.

Everyone experiences fear and anxiety in varying levels. Using your intellect to understand what is happening allows you the ability to stop, breathe and pull yourself back into the present moment, fully understanding that you have the power to do this.

3. Use Your Ingenuity

Using your imagination when experiencing old fear-based thinking is where your creativity comes into play. Perhaps give a name to your anxiety, such as “Fearful Freda,” or “Anxious Ann.” See it as existing outside of yourself and paying you a visit right now. Develop your script as to how you address your fear and anxiety. Look this visitor (fear) straight in the eye and let it know you see it. “Hello Fear, I see you have come to pay me a visit. I am busy today but will allow you ten minutes to visit me. Then you have to leave.” That is just an example of dialogue you might have with your feeling of fear or anxiety. You are using your intellect to see it as outside of yourself, and you are using your ingenuity to address it.

4. Use Your Willpower

When you use your intelligence and ingenuity in the face of fear, you begin to take away its power over you. Summoning your willpower to have the final say against your fear and anxiety is where you find peace and acceptance in the face of an uncertain future. Use your willpower to take actions that alleviate your fear. Become proactive in problem-solving the new challenges you face as you go through your divorce. Use your willpower to prevent fear-based thinking from influencing significant decisions you will make that impact your future. Fear is no match for your intellect, creativity, and determination to create a healthy, healing and loving life for yourself.

Day by day your future will unfold. Cultivate faith in the knowledge that some issues will be answered at the right time. When fear and anxiety pay you a visit, breathe, pull yourself back into the present moment and calm yourself by asking, Right now, at this moment, am I okay? Right now, at this moment, do I have everything that I need?

Brave hearts. Honor your courage. Honor your knowing.